Piece 2, S/S 2025 Collection: Hi, Ho, Hi, Ho, it's off to apologise I go!
- sarahsusak0
- Mar 31
- 4 min read
Updated: Apr 2
Releasing your very first book is no small feat, I gotta tell ya. And let’s just say last weekend felt very tangled up in a series of unexpected road blocks. In an effort to release the tensions building, I decided to take my daughter Stella to see Snow White at the movies. A bit of Disney is surely good for the soul that needs soothing.
On our way to the cinema, we ventured quickly into the UGG store to buy some winter warmers for Stella’s giant feet. With just minutes to go before the movie started, I can admit to having made a way-to-rushed mess taking multiple fur boots off their shelves before promising to come back after the famous princess had prevailed at restoring peace to the village.
When such peace had been gracefully restored by Ms. White, we re-approached our furry friends at UGG where I then seem to have singlehandedly destroyed peace with my sinfully aggressive reaction to our sales consultant’s dissatisfaction with our tidal wave of UGG-ly mess. This young lady proceeded to very pointedly refuse to bring us our size to try on until we had settled on one, and only one, UGG to purchase.
Well. It would appear that those tensions were not successfully soothed by Walt Disney at all. What happened next is forever etched on my egoic mind as a solid reminder of how never to act again. How very dare you speak to us like this, I challenged. How very not smart are you acting by favouring a stock take over a stock sale, I suggested. How very “not happening Jan” is any purchase of your fugly UGG’s by us, now or ever again, I threatened.
Now as a Vedic meditator who prides herself on her ability to avoid reactions of this nature, you will understand then the deep shame I feel when I reveal that on my way out of the store, whilst holding my impressionable and now grossly embarrassed 8-year-olds hand, I topped off my tirade by purposely knocking two more pairs of UGG’s off their shelves 😱. Take that my face signalled.
Who even does that? From the nano second that I left, the embarrassment and horror I felt about my behaviour was pulsating through my mind and body. As I was about to launch into defensive explanations to my daughter, despite knowing how wrong what I had done was, she just looked up at me like a wise Buddha and said “Mummy you need to go back and apologise.” I of course already knew that. But to have it suggested by my daughter made me as proud of her as it did ashamed of myself.
The situation got me thinking on how very hard apologising can feel even when you know you are entirely at fault. Yes, she had been unnecessarily rude to us but my reaction was just plain ridiculous. My stomach was craving some Sushi but I knew without a shadow of doubt that my very next meal just had to be a big fat slice of humble pie.
So Hi, Ho, Hi, Ho, it was off to apologise I go! Stella was holding my hand as I explained to the lovely lady that whoever she had met earlier was not who I really am and that the real me was so terribly sorry for my actions. I noticed a flicker of uncertainty in how to respond perhaps instinctively wanting to just give it to me. But, our equally vibrating frequencies of self-shame manifested the offering of a genuine apology in return and an acknowledgement that how she spoke to us could perhaps have been different also.
What followed was two well-meaning adults who had momentarily regressed to adolescent behaviours launching in for the most giant and lengthy of hugs. The seismic shift in how I felt made every single inch of the awkwardness of approaching the apology worthwhile. Looking over to Stella, who was now finding the hug between strangers more cringe worthy than the epic battle, it was very clear that she had a renewed sense of pride in her mum.
Having heard from Stella’s school only days before this happening that she herself finds it challenging to unconditionally apologise in the playground without “if’s” or “buts”, I knew that this was a moment to show her through example what to do when you behave in a way that you know is simply not right (and regardless of how the other person behaves).
As we left the store, I asked her whether if she was in the same situation, she would be able to do what I had just done. I had asked the question rhetorically, so confident that my example had shone a light on her own future approach to regrettable sins. But her answer was without hesitation. “Nup. Not a chance. But I’m proud of you mum.” That'll do for now, I guess.
I have just released my very first book YOURU: Find the Guru within You! If you enjoy my writing, I am pretty sure you will enjoy this book.
Love this epic story of rupture and repair.